The exchange of vows between the bride and groom during the ceremony is one of the most beautiful and romantic moments of the wedding. It’s the moment when the couple expresses words of love and commitment to each other.
If you’re considering writing your wedding vows but don’t know where to start, keep reading this article where we explain what wedding vows are and we give you our tips for writing yours.
What are wedding vows?
Wedding vows, or marriage vows, are the words of love and commitment exchanged by the bride and groom during the wedding ceremony. It’s a very romantic, personal, and special moment where the couple expresses their love, respect, and promises to each other.
Traditionally, it was the officiant who said these words, and the couple repeated them. As you may be familiar with: “I, [name of the groom or bride], take you, [name of the groom or bride], to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.”
Although in many weddings it’s still done this way, especially in religious ceremonies, nowadays vows are much more personal, and couples write their own vows.
by Laura Chacón Photography
The content of the vows can talk about how you met, your feelings towards your partner, the dreams you want to live together, promises, etc. It’s entirely up to you.
Wedding vows can have different styles: romantic vows, funny vows, traditional vows… You can even write a song for your partner! The important thing is that they express love for your partner and reflect your personality.
Not all couples decide to make wedding vows, but it’s a very emotional and beautiful moment where a very special emotion is felt.
by Laura Chacón Photography
When are wedding vows made?
Wedding vows are usually made during the wedding ceremony before the consent (the “I do”) and the exchange of rings. However, there is no rule, and it can be whenever the couple wishes. We recommend talking to the wedding officiant or coordinator to see when it’s most appropriate of the timing.
Some couples decide to make wedding vows in private, instead of in front of the guests, and they do it alone at another time during the wedding or on another day.
Some couples also decide to write each other a letter instead of saying vows at the ceremony. The important thing is that you choose the option that resonates with you the most and makes you feel comfortable.
by Atypical wedding and Lidia Ruiz Wedding Planner
Tips for writing wedding vows
Finally, we leave you with our tips for writing your wedding vows:
- Write them in advance and bring them written on the wedding day: Some people prefer to improvise, but we recommend writing them and bringing them written on the wedding day. It will be a day full of emotions, and nerves can make you completely forget what you wanted to say. Although you may end up saying them from memory or improvising, if you have them written, you can consult them if needed.
- Write the vows with time: The days leading up to the wedding are very busy days. We advise you to write them in advance so you can do it calmly and express what you want to say to your partner from the heart. Another recommendation is to write them or print them on nice paper, as they will appear in the ceremony photos.
- Balance both vows: Before writing the vows, it’s a good idea to talk a little between you about the length of these so that they are balanced. It doesn’t look very good if one of you has vows that are a page long and the other’s are just one sentence.
- Don’t be too long-winded: Summarizing your feelings for your partner in a paragraph or half a page is not easy, but we recommend that they not be too long so that it doesn’t become tedious for the guests and it’s easy for you to say them at the ceremony.
- Don’t reveal the vows to your partner before the wedding day: Although we know it’s difficult to keep the secret, it will be nice for the vows to be a surprise for both of you at the ceremony.
- Practice a few days before: Rehearsing the vows will help you say them with more ease and confidence at the ceremony. You can practice with a friend or in front of the mirror.
- Be yourself: The main thing when writing wedding vows is to be yourself and express naturalness and sincerity. Let the words flow from the heart and with your own language.
- Choose background music: It’s a good idea to have soft background music while saying the vows. Look for a song that accompanies your words and is special to both of you.
- Seek advice from the officiant: If you have doubts about the vows or don’t know where to start, we recommend asking the officiant of your wedding ceremony for advice. They have heard hundreds of wedding vows and will surely help you with them.
by Atypical wedding